If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
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