Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
