I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Randomize
