Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
