omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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