Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
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some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
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then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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