To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
how drunk are you?
Several
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize