I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
