I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
There's always time for handjobs
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Randomize
