nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
