"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
