Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
