A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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