her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I wish you could order shots online.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
