her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize
