Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
