We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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