She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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