its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I think I won the penis lottery.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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