I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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