Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
