Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize