I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
