dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I understand Curling. That high.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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