She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
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