By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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