My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
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