This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
