So drunk its hurt
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I will be naked everywhere
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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