yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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