ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
