But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize