Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize
