How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
