k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
