I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
