Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
