You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
