guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
