Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I'm getting married
To pizza
so much tequila, so little girl.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
