I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I have tasted many bathrooms
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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