i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize