Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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