"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize