New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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