I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
