Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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