I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Randomize
