There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Randomize
