I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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