Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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