Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
